


Tales Of Loosescrew

by beemblebummed



Series: Just A Loose Screw [1]
Category: MTMTE - Fandom, More than Meets the Eye - Fandom, TF - Fandom, Transformers, maccadam
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-28
Updated: 2015-03-03
Packaged: 2018-03-15 17:39:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3455990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beemblebummed/pseuds/beemblebummed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loosescrew is a young Cybertronian child who was part of a NAIL family, and too young to really even have been around except for the final years of the war. Her planet is attacked, and everyone killed but her, though her arm is blasted beyond repair. She's found by the Lost Light crew, and more or less adopted by Rodimus and Drift. </p>
<p>This story is mostly bits and pieces, different collections from the time she's on the ship, scattered around to post-issue 16. Contains spoilers and some possibly bothersome themes, such as violence and emotional stuff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fun At Swerve's

**Author's Note:**

> any warnings (minor things, such as swearing or possible spoilers) will be put on this same box in the individual chapters. pay close attention, as there are spoilers for MTMTE, and some themes you may find uncomfortable and whatnot. Please be safe!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when you leave Rodimus in charge of a child? He forgets their tendency to run off, and he loses them. In this case, Loosescrew decided she was bored of tagging along wit her captain "dad" and heads towards the bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> # swearing ( "hell," "damn it", "shit", "ass" and "fuck" )  
> # a child is put at semi-risk ( she's carried off by someone, only for fun, though; they'd never intentionally hurt her )

It was a terrible day for the crew of the Lost Light, though primarily, for its captain and his advisor. Rodimus, who had been in charge of Loosescrew for that particular hour, had let her sneak away. The Autobot’s audio receptors were still ringing with Drift’s outraged shouting and panic attacks.

 

The ex-Decepticon was still grumbling as they walked down the hallways as inconspicuously as possible. He would look over at Rodimus and shake his head with an exasperated sigh and then continue on in partial silence.

 

“Okay so, there’s only two of us and this is a big-ass ship,” Rodimus said softly to his friend. “Say we were able to trust someone else with our kid missing. Who would it be?”

 

“For the love of Primus, do _not_ tell Swerve or Whirl,” Drift replied instantly. “Ultra Magnus is a definite no-go.”

 

Rodimus was quiet for a moment and then shrugged, muttering, “Why don’t we just secretly comm. a few people and see what info they have?”

 

Drift rolled his optics and shook his head. “I… guess so? But Lucy’s very small. She’s still recovering from the surgery, and I doubt that she—”

 

As if fate just wanted to spite Drift, the mech’s audio receptor exploded with the loud voice of Skids, who shouted in an almost panicked voice, “ _Drift, so help me Primus, your little runt is here and she’s trying to trip me up!”_

Rodimus snickered and halted, crossing his arms as Drift patched into Skids’ comm. and demanded angrily, “Where are you, Skids?”

 

“ _At the damn bar, trying to get some peace from your tiny minion!”_ the mech shouted back. “ _Swerve’s got her now, tryin’ to teach her a song or something. Whirl walked in a minute ago and he’s already chatting her up.”_

The pair of mechs froze and both simultaneously whispered, “Shit,” before taking off at high speed to the bar.

 

* * *

 

 

“All right, pipsqueak, here’s how you sing the song. It starts off with ‘ _I was booorn on Luna Two, a bunch o’ walkin’ odds an’ en’—_ ”

 

The air of fun and care-freeness in Swerve’s bar was suddenly interrupted by the clumsy and chaotic scrambling of two mechs looking for their child. Whirl’s singing was interrupted by Lucy pointing and laughing at her bumbling fathers, who were coming closer as she did so.

 

Suddenly, Whirl decided to do something incredibly stupid which, at the time in his mind, felt like a great and hysterical thing to do. He snatched Lucy off the bar counter and cradled her in his arms, trying to look inconspicuous as he sauntered away from his place.

 

In the hustle of pushing through other crewmembers at the bar, Drift and Rodimus lost sight of both their child and Whirl. They didn’t really see her anyway, and they didn’t see Whirl grab her either.

 

Drift’s upper body more or less collapsed on the counter as he huffed, pointing at Swerve accusingly.

 

“Where… the hell… is Loosescrew?”

 

The bartender scoffed and shrugged, pointing off into the crowd afterwards. “Whirl grabbed her, I think. Took off into the crowd.”

 

“Are you _shitting_ me?” Rodimus demanded, eyes widening and upper body sagging lowly in defeat. He stood up straight after this moment of shock and then declared, “I knew I never liked that one-eyed freak!”

 

Drift groaned loudly and grabbed the captain’s wrist, tugging him into the thrall of the laughing, drinking, dancing crowd. He peered through the faces, looking for that familiar shade of bluish and that one eye stalk staring back. Keenly, the mech listened for his child’s voice, that giggle of hers, the unmistakable creak of her little body.

 

Rodimus shook his head as they swam through the other bots, muttering, “If he hurts her at all, I’m gonna mount his friggin’ head on my wall. She’s still recovering and if he jerks her around and acts rough with her—”

 

“There she is!”

 

Drift was about the only person who would continuously hold onto someone they were towing after taking off at top-speed for something. Rodimus almost hit the ground multiple times as he attempted to keep up with the other, who was deadest with every fiber off his being to get Loosescrew back.

 

Whirl turned at just the right moment to have Drift all but tackle him. They didn’t hit the ground, but it was a close call. Drift released Rodimus and seized Whirl roughly by the shoulders when he didn’t see his daughter there.

 

“Where the hell is Lucy?” he demanded in a snarl. “She’s still recovering, you asshole, and if she hurts herself getting riled up because _you_ thought it would be funny to toss her around, her arm nerves will be screwed for sure!”

 

“Calm down, samurai,” Whirl chuckled, trying to free himself of the concerned mech. “I handed her to Pipes. We’re just tryna have some fun. Why doncha pull that stick out of your ass, huh?”

 

Drift looked like he was literally about to explode. He looked almost as terrifying as a Sparkeater, or something close to it. He released Whirl, but it was by shoving him back with a great heave. As he took off through the crowd again, he shouted back, “I will take the stick out of my ass, and then I’m going to beat your head in with it!”

 

“Ew,” was all Rodimus said as he hurried past Whirl.

 

The advisor searched the crowd desperately for Loosescrew, the furiousness slowly receding and morphing into sheer panic. Pipes could accidentally drop her, and make her fall in such a way that her right arm was made to be worse. He could try to hand her off to someone who wouldn’t be careful with her. That person could hold her in such a way that she didn’t like it.

 

Suddenly, a loud and shrill scream erupted from somewhere nearby. Drift’s spark felt like it had just imploded, and he froze for just a moment; it was definitely Lucy, but where was she?

 

“Lucy?” he shouted desperately, continuing to plow through the other Cybertronians. “Lucy, where are you?!”

 

“Papa!” she yelled from somewhere on Drift’s right.

 

He wasted not a second before shoving through everyone in his way, demanding that a path be cleared. Only a few people heard, let alone cared, but it didn’t matter to Drift when he saw the little dusty red sparkling in Rung’s arms, looking a bit shaken but not scared or sad.

 

Drift’s entire body relaxed, relief flooding his face and becoming audible in a loud sigh. He practically leapt the distance between himself and the therapist, taking Lucy into his arms as fast as possible being careful with her.

 

“Uncle Whirly was just playing, papa,” she told Drift, huddling closely against his chassis. She sounded tired, and a little unconvinced of her words, but she said them anyway.

 

“Pipes realized Whirl was playing hide-the-child-from-her-parents and didn’t want to join in,” Rung said, nodding at Loosescrew. “He doesn’t know her very well, and didn’t know how comfortable she felt in his care. He gave her to me.”

 

Drift nodded, not replying for some time. He just held Lucy for a while, rocking her back and forth, relieved to have her in his arms again. Rodimus finally managed to find them again when Drift was able to talk without his voice shaking furiously.

 

Rodimus gently patted the side of Lucy’s face, smiling as she grabbed onto his finger and held it close. He glanced up at Rung as Drift said quietly, “Thank you, Rung. Primus, I was so… so damn worried. Lucy, you realize you’re not supposed to be running around yet?”

 

She didn’t let go of Rodimus’ finger or move in any way as she mumbled, “But papa, I wanted to see Swervester. And then Uncle Whirly wanted to play, so I played with him…”

 

“Bear in mind, you never have to do anything with anyone unless _you_ want to,” Drift said sternly. “Uncle Whirly could want to blow up a moon; if he wanted you to do it too, would you?”

 

Lucy hesitated and then mumbled, “No, papa, that’s bad…”

 

Rung nodded, smiling fondly. “Your fathers know what’s important,” he remarked. “Always do what _you’re_ comfortable with. Never anything else.”

 

“All right,” Rodimus said, looking around. “I think we need to go, this bar’s too loud and kiddo probably needs some sleep.”

 

Drift needed no further convincing; he thanked Rung again and then promptly headed out of the bar again. As the two fathers walked side by side down the halls back to the med bay, Loosescrew fell asleep in her papa’s arms.

 

When she was out, Drift looked over at Rodimus with an expression that was all but a glare. “Next time you watch her, you better actually watch her, you damn _idiot._ ”

 

“Hey, I was trying,” Rodimus replied. They both kept their tones low, not wanting to wake up the sparkling as soon as she was able to get some rest.

 

“You apparently weren’t trying enough,” Drift replied in a hiss as the infirmary doors opened. He didn’t look at his captain until he had placed Loosescrew carefully on a berth. First Aid arrived at the bedside and then looked over to Drift, a confused look on his face.

 

The little medic was going to ask something, but Drift said something first; jerking his thumb at Rodimus, he said, “It’s his fault. Just let her sleep for a little while.”

 

Drift turned and promptly smacked Rodimus over the head, telling him much of a horrible dad he was, only to be punched in the shoulder and told how overprotective he was. First Aid watched them on the way out, not one-hundred percent how they even functioned as a couple. However, with a simple shrug, he got back to work.


	2. Contemplations In The Med Bay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drift and Ratchet discuss Loosescrew's physical and emotional traumas, and when they'll start therapy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> # as it is part of Loosescrew's background, Drift ponders what horrors the child had to face. It is not detailed nor shown in flash-back sequences.  
> # doctors, surgeries and other medical procedures are mentioned, the first of which are present and important to this specific one-shot. ( the doctor is Ratchet, although First Aid is mentioned. )

Drift was cradling Loosescrew in his arms, thinking long and hard about her, where she came from and what they should do with her. The settlement where they’d found her had been completely and utterly destroyed, and everyone slaughtered. Somehow, Loosescrew survived, even though she lost an arm. Of course, that was only her physical loss. She lost her family, her friends, and her peace of mind... She was so young. She didn’t deserve it.

On top of that, she had already undergone three operations since joining the Lost Light. Half of her arm was gone, and the nerves where the two parts of her connected had been fried. They were unsalvageable, and so, she would never have an arm again that had full feeling in it. Her first operation took care of repairing what was broken, and by her second, Ratchet had confirmed her nerves were done for. Just a day ago, her third surgery had been performed; it was to ensure that all dead nerves and purposeless pieces were removed.

Ratchet had confined her to the infirmary for the third time, and didn’t let anyone touch her at all for the first several hours. After that, Drift and Rodimus were allowed near her, and then, at the present time, the medic decided it was safe for her to be moved a bit. She had woken up long before then, but she had played, or at least, talked a lot with First Aid and Tailgate, who had visited. When her papa was finally allowed in, she squealed with delight and scrambled out of her berth. Ratchet’s disapproving noises were heard not a moment after, and he was soon trying to convince the sparkling to get back on the berth. However, she refused to leave Drift’s arms.

Currently, her papa was in the med bay, rocking Lucy as she slept. He had been thinking a lot about her lately, but now, as she rested in his arms, he realized he needed to actually act on his thoughts.

“Ratchet,” the mech suddenly said, his voice soft and quiet.

The old medic glanced up from his datapad, grumbling about interruptions, but asking what Drift needed, nonetheless.

“Do you think we should start her on therapy, with Rung? Or at least, emotional therapy that is,” he said. “I think we still need to have her work with you, or First Aid, about her arm.”

Ratchet was sitting comfortably in his chair, and looked as though his conversation with Drift was of little importance, but it was a matter that needed to be addressed. And though he wasn’t terribly fond of being part of the addressing, Ratchet shrugged and replied, “As a medical officer, I say yes to both. As an old bot who still thinks he needs to retire, I would say do whatever you thought best. However, as the latter of the two is something no one will let happen, I insist you let myself and First Aid work with her on the matter of her missing limb and get her started with some sessions with Rung. When were you planning on doing something?”

Drift shrugged as well and mumbled, “I don’t know… I just know that watching everyone be murdered around you when you’re so young isn’t something that needs to be overlooked.”

“True enough,” Ratchet agreed. “All right, so, she’s still in need of some rest. You don’t recover from surgery in a day, you know. Just let her get some sleep, and then we can think about therapy.”

He hesitated in speaking at first, but slowly, Drift asked, “Hey, Ratchet, I was… wondering if… just for the night, if I, uh… could…”

Ratchet rolled his eyes and interrupted, pointing and saying with a grouchy tone, “Just sleep on the berth you picked her up from. If you’re a sleep-talker, I’m kicking you out, because I’ll be in here for the next few hours.”

Drift nodded, the relief on his face as obvious as day. He fell asleep in almost no time, comforted by his daughter’s presence and exhausted from the day.


	3. A Little R&R With Rung

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Drift is banished for reasons Loosescrew doesn't understand, the child attempts to cope with the loss of one father, due to another. Her sadness turns to anger at Rodimus, and she then turns to Rung for comfort and help in her pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> # spoilers for MTMTE issues 15-16, possibly 14 and 17  
> # in her confusion, Loosescrew lashes out at Rodimus and tells him to stop using affectionate nicknames and to stop referring to her as his own child.  
> # as Rung is a psychiatrist, and important to this chapter, he's in it quite a lot.

“Lucy, please look at me.”

 

She didn’t answer, and she wouldn’t care about anything he said for a long time.

 

“Lucy, will you please just… listen? I know you’re mad, but I… Drift, he…”

 

The little girl shook her head and just screamed, collapsing on the floor and covering her eyes afterwards. She began sobbing soon after, wailing as she just sat there. Rodimus didn’t know what to do. Would she even let him hold her now?

 

He took a deep and shaky breath and then said sternly, “Loosescrew, I’m your father, and you have to listen to m—”

 

“Papa told me to never do what I don’t wanna!” Lucy shrieked, still not moving. “And I don’t want to listen to you!”

 

If the screaming wasn’t enough, Loosescrew’s words were like a punch to the gut. Rodimus tried to say something; he _knew_ that he _needed_ to say something. But nothing was coming, and he didn’t know how to handle the situation. Drift was better at knowing what to say.

 

“Papa had to go, Lucy,” was all he managed to say.

 

“Don’t call me Lucy!” she suddenly shouted, trembling as she stood to her feet. The little sparkling looked up at Rodimus with eyes filled with so much confusion, and feelings of betrayal and sadness. She shook her head and whispered, “You’re not my daddy, be-because daddies are supposed to take care of their ba-babies!”

 

She turned and fled, screaming back, “You’re a bad daddy!”

 

Loosescrew wasn’t entirely sure where she could even go now. Whenever she was sad or scared, Drift would pick her up and hold her until she felt better. Now who could she go to? She wouldn’t decide until after she bumped into Rung, and as soon as she realized it was him, she decided he would be who she could trust, at least until papa got back.

 

She sobbed and clung to the psychiatrist’s leg, wailing, “Da-Daddy made Papa go away!”

 

Rung wasn’t sure how to respond. After a moment, very hesitantly and very carefully, he knelt down, teasing Loosescrew off of his leg and taking her in his arms. He patted her back gently, saying as soothingly as he could, “My dear, it will be all right…”

 

Rodimus came around the corner, not hurrying in anyway. He saw Rung holding his child and bit at his lip, doubting whether or not he should even approach. Lucy was shaking, still sobbing, and Rung was very upset. God knows where he stood on Rodimus’ decision. He was actually just about to step towards them anyway, but Rung looked up and their eyes met.

 

The disappointment was there, however light it was. Rung’s quiet sigh of tired exasperation could be heard from Rodimus’ position, but it was the disapproving head-shake that really changed the mech’s mind. Without a word, he turned and walked back the way he came, not second-guessing his decision at that moment.

 

He had to make hard decisions, and it was just how it had to be.

 

* * *

 

 

“All right, Loosescrew. I’m ready when you are, my dear.”

 

The little girl fidgeted slightly, looking around the room from her perch on the edge of the berth Rung’s patients always used. She shrugged and then began to draw little imaginary circles on her thigh, mumbling something incoherent.

 

“Do you want me to try and ask specific questions?” Rung asked gently, smiling for the little sparkling.

 

She nodded after a moment, but didn’t look up at the bot or speak. He nodded as well and thought for a moment, making up a few questions before actually speaking.

 

“How do you feel right now?” he asked her.

 

Lucy shrugged and mumbled, “Mad… sad… and tired, I think.”

 

Rung wrote down something in his datapad and then cautiously asked, “And is that anger directed at Rodimus? Only at him?”

 

The child whined softly and mumbled, “I… I’m mad because no one stopped Papa from leaving. Why did Papa have to go?” she asked, finally looking up at Rung. “Why... why did R... Rodimus send him away?”

 

The mech’s eyes widened and he blinked a few times, sitting up straight. Rung had never heard her refer to her father using his name. It was his understanding that she only wanted to know who was papa and who was daddy, not what their names were. She was young, and Rung knew that she found this to be very acceptable, that names didn’t matter.

 

However, it was simply shocking because she didn’t speak his name with the affectionate tone she usually did; there was anger and disgust in her struggled speaking.

 

Rung pieced together what he would say in his head first, ensuring nothing he said could be construed by the child as something he didn’t mean, and then shook his head with a sigh. “My dear, some things are very complicated. Being an adult does not mean being all-knowing. Do you understand?”

 

She was quiet, but she nodded, and then hung her head again, like before. The sparkling resumed drawing her circles, seeming as though she wasn’t paying attention to the psychiatrist at all.

 

“All right, so, is there anything that you are sad about, other than Drift being sent away?” Rung inquired very gently. He didn’t want to send her over the edge, and not only was she a child, but she was a traumatized child, and now one of her fathers had sent her other father away.

 

Loosescrew suddenly jerked slightly. Her little body had jumped with the sob she uttered, and continued to shake as she replied, yet again, incoherently. She was soon a squabbling mess of wailing and words Rung couldn’t determine. He didn’t quite feel it was his place to do so, but Loosescrew needed a hug. He had noticed straight away that she responded positively to physical interactions, to hugs and hand-holding, forehead kisses and being held in someone’s arms. It was important to her, and would probably play an important part in her recovery.

 

Though Rung felt a bit like he was not the proper person to do it, he set down his datapad and carefully took her into his arms, making sure she would be as comfortable as possible. She made no complaints, and even relaxed, her cries dying down at his touch.

 

“I’m s-sorry, Uncle Rung,” she apologized with a slight hiccup. “I-I can get d-down if you want.”

 

Okay, choose your words carefully, Rung. Inflections, tones and wording are all important things here, especially for a child. One slip up could mean everything.

 

He very slowly began to rock her back and forth, politely and, despite how panicked he was mentally, calmly saying, “It’s fine if you are comfortable. You like hugs, don’t you?”

 

Loosescrew nodded and smiled a little, shifting around slightly to be more comfortable. She let the side of her face rest on Rung’s chest, relaxing in a very short time. Her breathing slowed and her hiccups left a few minutes after and then, just like that, she was asleep in Rung’s arms.

 

He sighed and shook his head. “If this is how it will always go, just what am I supposed to do with you, my dear?” he said aloud, but softly enough to not awaken Loosescrew. He didn’t know whether he should go and find Rodimus or just rest himself for a little while, since the therapy session was apparently over. Maybe at the time, Rodimus wasn’t the best person to be around Loosescrew. She was his daughter, adopted or not, but Rung honestly believed space would be a good thing for the two.

 

“I suppose,” he mumbled, stifling a yawn, “I’ll just… get some rest as well…”


	4. The Art Of Coping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still bothered by the loss of her "papa", every day on the Lost Light seems like nothing but a dream to Loosescrew. With Drift gone, the loss of a certain minibot and the virtual non-existence of Chromedome in Lucy's day-to-day schedule, things fall apart even more. She struggles to find any footing in her descent into numbness and she feels even more betrayed by the actions of one she considered a friend, and "friend" meant someone who shared her new opinions of Rodimus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> # hints of Rung/Rodimus  
> # spoilers for MTMTE issues 15-16  
> # mentions of Ratchet and First Aid, also Loosescrew's therapy.  
> # swearing ( only "fuck" and "hell" )

Loosescrew didn’t like being around Rodimus anymore. She would find her little spot on Swerve’s counter, dangling her feet over the edge, her back to the crowd and her eyes wandering over the different drinks the mech had. She always asked about them, and he would happily answer any and all questions, almost always telling her he would make a special drink just for her when she was old enough to have it.

 

This routine included Whirl coming to the counter and chatting with Loosescrew about his weapons, all the stuff he would teach her about them, and usually, Chromedome would come over as well. He would be the one to tell Loosescrew that she should leave the bar, and go find Rung. He knew not to mention Rodimus, or to tell her to go to him. Rung was basically her stand-in father for the time being, considering one of them sent the other away.

 

He would help her off the counter, give her head a little pat and tell Rewind to walk her to the door, if the minibot was there. Before she walked away, back down the hall in search of Rung’s office, Loosescrew would give the small bot a hug and thank him. He felt flattered that, every single time, this was what she did. It wasn’t very hard walking from the counter to the door, but Lucy still thanked him each time.

 

The entire part of her routine concerning Chromedome and Rewind no longer happened after Rewind’s death, and Chromedome’s sealing himself away.

 

On her way back to Rung’s office, Loosescrew passed Tailgate, who was chatting to Cyclonus about something the child didn’t listen to. As she passed them, however, Tailgate greeted her enthusiastically, wishing her a good evening. Cyclonus only spoke in a grunt, which sounded like it was probably a “what he said” noise.

 

When Lucy got to Rung’s office, she heard voices. Before she stepped into the doorway, she recognized one of them as Rodimus’, and hesitated, hugging the wall and listening. He was definitely talking with Rung, and their tones were hushed and non-violent. It was still an argument, but it wasn’t a heated one.

 

“Look, Rung, I’m tryin’, I am honestly, really tryin’, but she… she doesn’t wanna listen to me anymore.”

 

“That may have something to do with you never speaking to her.”

 

“Rung, I have tried on multiple occasions! She barely looks at me now, and she isn’t… isn’t even calling me her dad anymore.”

 

There was a short silence, and then Rung murmured, “She’s a child, Rodimus. She’s hurt. Her dad sent away her papa. She doesn’t understand why; all she knows is the anger at you and the sadness of her loss. She’s been saying that she’s just tired a lot, that she never wants to leave her berth anymore.”

 

Another silence followed Rung’s words.

 

“Is she sick?”

 

“No, not physically,” Rung replied quietly. “But emotionally, and mentally, she’s very sick. She’s fallen into a very, very specific routine, and she doesn’t do anything besides it. She won’t talk to anyone except Whirl, Swerve and I. Even Tailgate she’s grown apart from. She’s just… sad. She doesn’t know what to do.”

 

“Do you?”

 

Rung sighed. “No, Rodimus, I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to help her through it, I’m trying to talk with her and find out if she has anything else to say. Ratchet and First Aid are still working with her on her physical therapy, but it’s getting to the point where that’s stressful for her. For the first time in… _ever,_ she shouted at First Aid. But she didn’t speak, no, he just did what he’s always done with her and she just… screamed.”

 

Loosescrew gasped quietly from her hiding spot. She _had_ screamed at First Aid, but she still hadn’t figured out exactly why. She really liked First Aid. He was sweet and funny and snuck her treats. But she felt something was wrong and became angry. It wasn’t his fault. But she didn’t tell him that.

 

Rodimus just sighed, and his body creaked a bit, which meant he was probably slacking and rubbing his face like he did whenever he got upset about Lucy copying him, repeating certain words he’d rather her not say.

 

“Rung, you better keep this to yourself, but I… I am really scared. I’m terrified as hell. I don’t know what to do without Drift, and I don’t… I don’t want him to be gone. On top of that, I’m just really scared that Lucy isn’t ever going to forgive me, and that she’s never going to be all right. I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t know how to talk to her, what I should say, how I should say it, _when_ I should say it, and I just—”

 

He suddenly stopped speaking. Loosescrew didn’t know what happened, because Rung stopped speaking too. She peered around the corner of the wall, her eyes widening and her jaw dropping at what she saw.

 

“Get your mouth off of Rung’s!” she cried loudly, scrambling into the room and proceeding to hit Rodimus’ legs as hard as she could which, given her size, wasn’t hard at all.

 

The two mechs separated, looking down at the child with shocked gasps. They both froze, not knowing what to do. Loosescrew continued to hit Rodimus for a moment, and then, whimpering, she slid down onto her knees.

 

“You’re only supposed to do that with Papa,” she sobbed, trembling. “Yo-you aren’t… supposed to do that... Th-that means you don’t love Papa anymore!”

 

Rung was the first to kneel down at Loosescrew’s level, cautiously reaching out and placing a light hand on her shoulder. Rodimus followed him down, panicking inwardly and scrambling to find words to speak.

 

“My dear, Rodimus still loves your papa very much,” Rung said softly, smiling for the child.

 

“Then why did you send him away?!” she suddenly shouted, looking up at Rodimus. He tensed, his words stopping at his lips. He didn’t know how to respond to that.

 

Rung sighed and shook his head. “You are a very smart little girl, but that doesn’t mean you’ll quite grasp what this situation is. Remember how I once told you that even adults can be confused, too?”

 

She just nodded, sniffling and continuing to shake.

 

He nodded as well and told her, “Well… that’s how it is, my dear. It’s very confusing. All right?”

 

“Y-yeah,” she mumbled, shrugging Rung’s hand off her shoulder. She climbed back to her feet and stumbled back to the door. “I don’t wanna be here. I’m going to see Uncle Ratchet.”

 

Rodimus took a step after her, his voice breaking as he said, “Lucy, wait—”

 

The sparkling whipped around and cried, “Don’t call me Lucy! You’re not a good daddy!”

 

He winced and then, as Loosescrew clumsily wandered back into the hallways, turned to Rung with one of the most helpless expressions the therapist had seen. Rodimus pointed at the doorway, whispering desperately, “How can I fix this when she doesn’t even want me to speak to her? What the hell am I supposed to do, Rung? I’ve fucked this up so badly my own child doesn’t want me to talk to her! I sent Drift away and she’s never going to forgive me!”

 

Rung just looked at Rodimus for a moment and then shook his head, silently raising his arms to wrap them around Rodimus’ shoulders. He held the mech in his embrace, closing his eyes with a light sigh. It wasn’t until a moment later that Rodimus slowly relaxed, squeezing his eyes shut with a small sob as he returned the embrace. Neither of them spoke, but there wasn’t silence. Rodimus’ soft, heart-broken sobs filled the silence, leaving Rung able to do nothing but hold him, and hope it would be all right.


	5. Lonely Lullabies Are Immortal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback chapter of moments shared between Drift and Loosescrew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> # major spoilers for MTMTE issues 14-16  
> # hints of Rodimus/Drift and Ratchet/Drift  
> # canon character deaths

There was very little that Loosescrew could actually remember. She didn’t like the little things that she _did_ remember, and it made her scared and uncomfortable. Rung wanted to try and get something out of her, something that could maybe help with who attacked her family and help straighten out all of the child’s fears and such.

 

She almost didn’t tell Ratchet about her nightmares, for fear of Rung only trying harder to get her to remember things she didn’t want to. That was early on, early in her joining of the Lost Light, however, and now, telling people like Ratchet, First Aid, Drift and Rung was a natural thing for Loosescrew. When she first told the older medic about her nightmares, his usually grumpy and sour demeanor changed to that of concern, much like the concern Drift and Rodimus would soon show every day for the adopted child.

 

“You realize you can let us know about anything, at anytime, and we’re going to help you with it, right?” the bot had said, his voice gentle and soft. It had surprised Loosescrew just a bit. But it was then that she realized that, yes, she could indeed trust them. She started opening up then, first to her doctors, then to a silly bot who had big headfins, much like ears, just like her. They weren’t _exactly_ like hers, but she thought it was neat that they both had them.

 

He had shiny blue eyes, a big grin and was gentle and sweet. At first, Loosescrew was just a little bit scared of him. He always carried a sword, and he would sometimes stare off, and look a bit frightening while doing so. However, it took very little time for her to realize he was a kind mech, someone she could trust without a second thought. He always sat in the medical bay with her, held her hand if Ratchet had to use his sharp, scary needles, and even sang her to sleep sometimes.

 

Loosescrew didn’t realize how much she appreciated Drift checking for her permission to hold her, to touch her in anyway, even if it was a little forehead kiss or gentle squeeze of the hand. One particular night, the little child had fallen asleep in the middle of Drift talking to her. He had almost left the infirmary so she could sleep, but, with no warning prior, Loosescrew had begun whining in her sleep. Those whines turned to pleas to be left alone, to not be hurt, and soon she was kicking and screaming while she slept.

 

Drift had hurried to try and wake her, never once being rough or yelling. However, Loosescrew wasn’t awake herself until she had woken up both Ratchet and First Aid and almost anyone nearby. Pipes, Rewind and Rodimus had more or less crashed into the infirmary, the captain entering with a loud “What’s happening?”

 

At that point, Drift was holding the little panicked child in his arms, still trying to quiet her down. She clung to him, wrapping her one arm around his neck as she continued to wail. She was crying now, and shaking and babbling in between her terrified cries. Drift softly shushed her, rocking back and forth as he bounced her just a little bit. It took what seemed like an hour, but she was soon sleeping once again, and Ratchet made sure to give her a small sedative to help her sleep a little easier.

 

Now that she was sleeping again, the bots who had rushed in to see what was wrong had no need to stay. After Pipes bid everyone goodnight, wishing anyone who would help with Loosescrew good luck, he left for more rest. Rewind stuck around, insisting on doing something to help, to try doing something for both the little child and her caretakers. Drift insisted Rewind leave, that he go get some rest. Finally, the archivist was convinced to leave, but only after he expressed explicitly that he wanted to stay in the loop on Loosescrew’s conditions and it was only after literally everyone there promised to do what he said.

 

Now, besides the doctors, Rodimus and Drift were the only ones left in the bay with Loosescrew.

 

“You doin’ okay, Drift?”

 

The samurai had nodded at that. He didn’t say anything, though, which was enough for Rodimus to know that that gesture was more or less a lie. He had coaxed Drift into Lucy’s berth, still holding the child from her nightmare. Rodimus was a bit worried for his TIC, not wanting him to tax himself, especially not with the burden of a child who he had already, no doubt, gotten attached to.

 

“You look like you’re fighting sleep, you dumbaft,” Rodimus said softly to Drift, looking at him with amusement. “Just get some rest; you can hold the kid while you sleep.”

 

Drift nodded, barely able to keep his optics open. He glanced over at Ratchet, who was still up and about, looking over datapads and muttering to himself. Drift wanted to be sure it was even okay for him to stay in the medical bay, to stay with Loosescrew, but Rodimus had figured this out.

 

“Hey, Doc,” he said, looking over at Ratchet. “Drift’s staying here tonight, he’s gonna sleep with the runt. Captain’s orders.”

 

There was a quiet sigh from the medic, but he didn’t argue. Rodimus grinned and then turned his focus back to Drift. He was about to make some sort of remark, but his friend had already passed out. With a quiet chuckle, Rodimus very lightly gave Drift’s shoulder a pat.

 

Gentle touches like that was something Drift would miss. He would remember little things like that, tiny moments he had with Rodimus that were nice and happy, after he was banished. He knew it was important for Rodimus to lead the quest, to do what they had set out to do, but he would carry anger and bitterness with him even so. He lost his crewmates, he lost a home, and he lost Loosescrew.

 

He didn’t know what she would have thought. He didn’t know he she reacted to being left there, to losing her papa. Before he was banished, Rodimus had him go to the infirmary, to tell Loosescrew one final goodbye. When they got there, they found her asleep. She was stressed, scared and still recovering from Overlord’s rampage, and then, because of that rampage, the loss of Rewind. She didn’t know how to process it exactly. So she cried.

 

Drift felt a lump in his throat when he saw the child sleeping on the same berth he had slept with her on multiple times. She still had tear stains on her face, and she made small hiccupping noises in her sleep. The mech didn’t know how to sort out how he felt. She was asleep, and he wouldn’t have to see her cry because he was leaving. But she was asleep, and so she wouldn’t even be able to tell him goodbye.

 

He stood beside the bed, his hands gripping the edges tightly as he tried to figure out what he was going to do. He wasn’t going to wake her up. That would be cruel, because not only was this rest helping her with her stress over Rewind, but waking her up would only give her more reasons to stress, and to cry.

 

“You don’t deserve any of this,” Drift whispered, choking back a sob. He reached out with a shaky hand and gently wiped off any tears she still had. “Lucy, I’m so sorry, I’m… I’m so sorry that this has to happen. I—”

 

He stopped, taking a deep breath to prevent himself from crying. This wasn’t how he wanted to tell her goodbye, especially if she were to wake up.

 

“Hey, Drift?”

 

He jumped at the voice, looking over to see Ratchet, who was still looking a bit battered from the attack. The medic looked exhausted, and sad. He stood a few paces in front of the door, looking at Drift with one of the most resigned glints in his optics the samurai had seen. With a sigh and a shake of his head, Ratchet approached his friend and hesitantly reached up to grab Drift’s shoulder. He squeezed it gently, trying to be reassuring without hurting his friend.

 

Drift wanted to just break down. He wanted to drop his walls and cry. It was probably selfish, considering he was leaving in just the next little while, and would leave Ratchet with a feeling of worry and sadness. Unless the medic just blocked it out, pretended everything was all right.

 

“I can’t wake her up,” he whispered, looking to Loosescrew. “I can’t wake her up, deprive her of sleep, after what’s happened.”

 

Ratchet didn’t know what to say to that. He shook his head again and said softly, “She’s lost two people she considers big brothers, or uncles, whichever. Chromedome will either seal himself away or set himself apart from everyone for a good long while. That’s three people, Drift, and that doesn’t even include Magnus.”

 

“Exactly,” Drift responded, reaching up to hide his eyes as he continued to hold back his hurricane of emotions. “I… Ratchet, I don’t know what to _do._ ”

 

They stood in silence for what seemed like a long while. Then, Ratchet spoke up softly, “You can leave her a recording, for when she when wakes up.”

 

Drift’s hand dropped away from his face and he looked over to the medic, eyes wide, lips parted in a very surprised expression. At first he just looked startled, like the idea was something he had needed to hear, or was shocked that it would even come to Ratchet’s mind as a solution. He didn’t say a word, his face only changing in that he closed his mouth, squeezing his lips together as he looked back to the child sleeping.

 

It wasn’t until about a minute later that Drift hung his head and then took a breath. Ratchet could see that he was shaking, trying hard to keep himself as calm and collected as possible.

 

“Will you, um... will you make sure she gets it, Ratchet?” he suddenly asked, looking up to his friend with a face now streaked with tears.

 

The bewilderment in Ratchet’s face and his cut-short “Drift—” were what made the samurai aware he was crying now. He quickly turned the other way, rubbing harshly at his cheeks and optics. Ratchet didn’t know what to say once again. He wanted to tell his friend that it would be okay, that Loosescrew was going to be fine, that it wasn’t going to end this way, with Drift being banished, to never see his friends, his _family_ again. That would only be a lie. Rewind was dead, Pipes was dead, Ultra Magnus was _almost_ dead and there were countless injured. It would completely idiotic to tell Drift everything would be okay.

 

So Ratchet did the only thing he thought he could do.

 

“I’ll make sure she gets the video, Drift. And… and I’ll look after her.”

 

He didn’t expect to suddenly have Drift’s arms wrapped around him, the samurai completely letting himself fall apart. His cries rang in Ratchet’s ears and coupled his repetitive “thank you” nearly caused Ratchet to tear up as well.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Hey Lucy? Hey, sweetie, it’s...it’s me. It’s Papa. Look, honey, I… I know you’re scared, and I know you’re hurting. I know you miss Pipes and uncle Rewind, but… they’re not coming back, okay? But it’s.. it’s kind of okay, because now they’re never gonna hurt again, understand? They’re in the Well of Allsparks, now, and they don’t have to be sad or hurt anymore. Okay?”_

He shifted just a little bit and paused for a while. A very soft urge from Ratchet to continue was faintly heard off-camera, and so Drift nodded and cleared his throat.

 

“ _That scary bot that attacked and hurt everybody, well, his name was Overlord. He was a bad person, but he’s gone now. I… I did some bad things, understand? Papa is one of the reasons he was on this ship, but we… we didn’t know he would get out. We were going to make him tell us some things, and those things were gonna help us a lot. But things didn’t work out like they were supposed to. Papa’s in trouble now, and I… I have to leave the ship. Daddy’s sending me away, but it’s okay, because I’m going to be okay.”_

At this, he stopped again, and then shook his head. He had tried to look happy, positive, for the child, but it was gone as he suddenly frowned and his eyes glinted with tears. He felt like an idiot, saying “I’ll be okay” and promptly losing his positive façade.

 

“ _Drift, you okay?”_ came Ratchet’s voice.

 

He nodded in reply and then took a deep breath, holding up his hand, palm out. His smile came back, and though his voice shook, it was still reassuring.

 

“ _I’m sorry I can’t be there anymore, Loosescrew. I’m sorry I didn’t wake you up to say goodbye. I’m sorry I let you down, and I… all I can do is tell you this: you’re going to do so well. You’re going to help your dad with the quest, and you’re gonna find what you’re looking for and you’re going to grow up to be a strong person, you hear me? I love you so much.”_

* * *

 

 

Loosescrew looked up from the screen, staring wide-eyed at Ratchet. She didn’t speak at all for a full minute. Then tears sprung from her eyes, down her face and she grit her teeth together, choking out several sobs before scrambling down off of her berth. She made a run for the med bay doors and for a moment, Ratchet was going to go after her. Then he stopped. It was pointless. She needed to mourn, and she needed space.

 

“I’ll protect her with everything I have, Drift,” the old medic said softly to himself. “I’m sorry.”


End file.
